When our loved-one dies

What to Do When Your Spouse Dies: A Step-by-Step Checklist for the First Days and Weeks

Losing a spouse is one of life’s most painful experiences. In the midst of grief, a mountain of practical tasks can feel overwhelming. This checklist breaks down the essential steps—starting with immediate actions and moving through financial, legal, and estate matters—so you can focus on healing while staying organized. At SYNERGY HomeCare of the West Valley, we are committed to supporting you through the final stages of life and after. Take a look at the steps and considerations for when a loved one dies.

1. Arrange the Funeral or Memorial (First 24–72 Hours)

• Contact a funeral home or cremation service.

• Decide on burial, cremation, or donation to science.

• Order death certificates (request at least 10 certified copies; you’ll need them for banks, insurance, Social Security, etc.).

Tip: Funeral homes often help obtain death certificates. Check with your state’s vital records office for costs (typically $10–$25 per copy).

2. Notify Close Family and Friends

• Make a short list of people to call personally.

• Consider a trusted friend or family member to help spread the word.

• It is nice to publish an obituary, but consider that it alerts predators who might not have your best interests in mind. Consult with family members to decide if a newspaper obituary is going to be published.

3. Secure the Home and Valuables

• Lock the house, change alarm codes if needed.

• Locate important documents: will, trust, insurance policies, deeds, titles, safe deposit box keys.

4. Notify the Social Security Administration (SSA)

• Call 1-800-772-1213 (or visit a local office) within 30 days.

• If your spouse was receiving benefits, report the death to stop payments.

• You may qualify for a one-time $255 lump-sum death benefit (if you were living together).

• Surviving spouses age 60+ may be eligible for survivor benefits (up to 100% of the deceased’s benefit if taken at full retirement age).

Documents needed: Death certificate, Social Security numbers (yours and deceased), marriage certificate, birth dates.

5. Contact Life Insurance Companies

• Locate all policies (employer, private, Transamerica, etc.).

• Submit a claim with:

  • Certified death certificate

  • Policy number

  • Claimant statement

• Payouts are usually tax-free.

6. Handle Bank Accounts and Credit Cards

• Joint accounts: Usually pass directly to the surviving spouse (notify the bank with death certificate).

• Sole accounts in deceased’s name: Will go through probate unless POD/TOD designated.

• Close or remove the deceased as an authorized user on credit cards.

• Notify credit bureaus (Equifax, Experian, TransUnion) to prevent identity theft.

7. Notify Pension Plans, Annuities, and Retirement Accounts

• Contact employers, 401(k)/IRA custodians, and pension administrators.

• Ask about survivor benefits or rollover options.

• Update beneficiary designations on your own accounts.

8. File for Other Benefits

• Veterans Affairs (VA): Burial benefits, survivor pension, DIC (Dependency and Indemnity Compensation).

• Union or fraternal organizations: Death benefits.

• Long-term care insurance (e.g., Transamerica): Check for payout if policy included a death benefit rider.

9. Estate and Probate Steps

Task

Why It Matters

Locate the will or trust

Determines how assets are distributed

File the will with probate court (if required)

Legal process to transfer assets

Appoint an executor/administrator

Manages estate debts and distribution

Pay final bills (medical, credit cards, utilities)

Prevents collections or liens

File final income tax return (by April 15 of following year)

IRS Form 1040 + “Deceased” on name line

File estate tax return (Form 706) if estate > $13.61M (2025 threshold)

Federal estate tax may apply

10. Update Titles and Deeds

• Real estate: File an affidavit of death with the county recorder.

• Vehicles: Transfer title at DMV with death certificate.

• Stocks/brokerage accounts: Contact transfer agent.

11. Cancel Services and Subscriptions

• Driver’s license (return to DMV)

• Passport

• Voter registration

• Magazine subscriptions, gym memberships, etc.

12. Take Care of Yourself

• Accept help with meals, childcare, or paperwork.

• Consider grief counseling (many hospices offer free support).

• Avoid major financial decisions for 6–12 months.

Final Thoughts

Grief doesn’t follow a timeline, but having a plan reduces stress. Keep a dedicated folder for all death certificates, correspondence, and receipts. If the estate is complex, consult an estate attorney or CPA early.

You don’t have to do this alone. Lean on family, friends, and professionals. Healing takes time—and taking care of these details is one way to honor your spouse’s legacy.

In memory of those we’ve lost. You are not alone.

Resources:

• Social Security: ssa.gov

• VA Benefits: va.gov

• IRS Estate Tax: irs.gov

• Grief Support: grief.com or local hospice

This post is for informational purposes only and is not legal or financial advice. Consult professionals for your specific situation. Call us today 623-246-1000 or contact us on the web at www.westvalleyhomecare.com